It has been 6 months since we lost our beautiful Zack, and perhaps it may sound silly to anyone reading this post that I am still heartbroken and missing him terribly. There will be some who will say, “He was only a dog, for goodness sake!” But Zack was more than a dog: he was our friend and a much valued member of our family.
Today, Hubby, dressed in a black jumper, was looking out of a bedroom window towards the calm waters of Lake Windermere and Lakeland fells. Sunshine was pouring into the room, with bright shards glancing off his clothing. The sunbeams picked up a springy white hair – just one hair. I looked at that hair: it was approximately 3 inches long, slightly wavy, and then loosely curled into coils at the end.
I said to Hubby, “That’s Zack’s hair.”
“Zack’s hair? What are you talking about?”
“It’s Zack’s hair. Look!”
I picked that one strand of hair off Hubby’s jumper and showed it to him. He turned back to face the window, and said quietly, “Mmm. Yes. Zack’s hair. Why would Zack’s hair be here?”
“He’s saying, ‘Don’t forget me!'”
Tears welled and trickled from my eyes and down my face, and I rushed off bearing that one strand of hair. Sitting in a quiet corner, I sobbed, teardrops falling down my cheeks. Zack, my dear, dear, dear, beloved boy. Even now, as I write, tears are beading in my eyes and I have had to pause awhile to wipe them away.
Absence does not simply make the heart grow fonder. Absence – death – the finality of things – brings memories both to the fore, creates a hole in the heart of those left behind, and makes us wish for what can no longer be.
Oh, my dearest Zack! How I miss you so!
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